I miss you so

I loved the way you said you were there,
I loved the way you said you cared.
I loved it when you said it was just you and me,
for ages would we sit and stare.

I miss the way you held me tight,
and made sure nothing could go wrong.
I miss the way you would let me know
when everything was just so right.

I need you so,
I want you back.
I made a mistake,
now I know.




Fuck I suck at poems :|

He came in and took everything from me.

There I woke,
Nothing left,
Naked on the floor.
He came in and took everything from me.
First he came in, and he stole my first kiss, I then let him in my home.
Valentines day was that day, and he surprised me with a gift. A long stemmed rose.
I hadn't been expecting one, nor had I expected him to show up at my door and kiss me.
After I let him in, we talked and talked about where we want to go in life.
The sun went down, the sky got darker.
He told me about his fear of driving in the dark and told me it was stupid.
I reassured him and said, that was no problem. So many people still have fears of the dark at Eighteen funnily enough.
He laughed, then I invited him to stay the night.
He gladly excepted and suggested he sleep on the lounge, I told him dont be rediculous and he could sleep in my bed and I sleep in my parents bed as they were away for the weekend.
He said no and he couldn't kick me out of my own room.
He then suggested I sleep in the same bed as him.
I sat there in silence thinking if it were the right thing to do.
He was amazingly gorgeous and I had had a crush on him for a long time.
I accepted and told him it was only because it was him being polite with a smile on my face.
After we joked and talked about our lives a little more,
he asked if I were ready for bed.
And I was.
I had been up since four in the morning and it was now around ten-thirty.
We both got , he grabbed his big gym bag that looked pretty much empty and we got into the room, he asked what side I slept on, and I replied, 'Opposite to the side you sleep on.' And smiled.
He got comfy, as did I.
I mentioned I was cold and would get another blanket, but he rolled over and hugged me and promised me he would keep me warm all night.
Not once did I think of pulling away, this man was the man I had been waiting for since I started high school.
He got closer and pulled me towards him even more.
I could feel his breath breathing on my neck, oh how that made me want to turn and kiss him.
But I resisted, I couldn't do it.
But when he started to kiss my neck I couldn't help but turn my head to face his and kiss him back.
After a while of kissing him he felt me up and down.
He grabbed my shirt and ripped it off.
Not long after that we were in bed rolling around completely naked.
He then stopped and got up and went through his bag and pulled out what I knew we both wanted,
he put it on and said, 'the floors more fun.' With a grin from ear to ear.
I then smiled back and got on the floor with him, his bag was on the floor and he picked it up and put it on the desk.
The bagged was empty and just laid there.
In the morning,
There I woke,
His bag was gone and so was he.
Nothing left,
He came in and took everything from me.
First my kiss, then my virginity and now everything that was light enough to carry and small enough to fit in his gym bag.
Which was everything except my desk.
There I woke,
Nothing left,
Naked on the floor.
He came in and took everything from me.

Not good enough.

Have you ever felt like you're not good enough.
Like anything you do or say is just wrong,
And you can't pretend to be who they think you are.
You want to be yourself without being judged,
You want to have people know the real you.
You want to be how you are when you with them 24/7.
But you know you will lose so much if you did.

Boy and his Guitar.

The way he felt when he would play it right.
The way his hands danced up and down the neck was mesmerizing.
You could tell he was enjoying it.
His eyes shut and his head swinging from side to side.
His lips moved and let out the most amazing voice to go along with his dancing hands,
letting the noise flow with his voice.
The way he caressed the instrument,
as he sat on the step outside his home with the sun on his face,
was amazing.

His love was just lie.

She heard it, and didn't believe the rumors.
She didn't want to believe it was true, she couldn't believe it was true.
She loved him and he loved her.
Until she walked in to find him with the other one,
screamign and shouting the other ones name.
She stood there watching the other one, what else could she do.
She didn't want to believe it, but now she seen it with her own eyes.
She seen the way he showed his so called 'love' for the other one.
Pulling her hair, scratching her back, biting her neck.
When he finally seen noticed her standing at the door he yelled, and pushed her away,
'its not what you think.'
How could it not be what she thought, two completely naked people in his bed screaming and thrusting.
Her eyes filled with tears as the other one giggled with the sheets wrapped around her body.
He starred and was motionless.
She left the room crying wondering how could she had not believed the rumors.
Why did she let her guard down and let her believe him when he would say, 'I love you.'




It's 2010. now live it happy.

Bored blog

IM bored.
I have ebery single song stuck in my head that people sung last night.
Im boreddddd.
I want a cookie,
I might write a bit.
Kebab for dinner?
I dont know.
I dont want to go to school.
GAH!
Gay,
the shirt is massive!
The skirt is down to my knees.
hating it!

OH GOD last night.
Was the best until,
drama drama drama.
Silly misunderstanding?
I dont know.
But they didnt say that,
And i love them.
Lots and lots.
:D
They dont know how much and what i would do for them.

I want you.

I want to feel your touch.
I want to feel your lips hit mine.
I want to feel you breath breathing down my neck.
I want my hairs to stand on end as you kiss my collarbone.
I want to feel the shock after you bite the side of my neck.
I want to hear you whisper in my ear from behind as you hold me tight.
I want to let you feel me all over.
I want to let you make me breath hard.
I want to let you make me moan.
I want you to feel me scratch you.
I want you to feel me bite.
I want to feel you pull my hair.
I want to let you make me scream with your touch.
I want you.




It's 2010. now live it happy.

A part from what I might write.

The way our eyes meet accross the room, You can't only see it but feel it. I wanted you to walk towards me, and when you did I wanted you to turn away. You knew the moment we would start to talking we wouldn't be able to stop. Then you knew where we would go if we started walking. To my barn. Our barn, the place we could be each other. The place you knew I loved. When you brushed you hand on my cheek and said, 'Lets go'. I wanted to run and meet you there.
When we got there. You held my hand and led me in. I had been there before many times and knew where to go, but I wanted you to hold me. I looked at the ground, not at your face. I wanted to. I wanted to kiss you however I couldn't have stood the rejection if you said no. But then you lifted my head and kissed me softly. Your hands slid down my back and grabbed me closer towards you. The kiss was getting harder and rougher. I grabbed your head and held you closer. You pushed me up against the barn wall and kissed me like you had no intention of stopping. Your hands were moving all over me. I enjoyed the thrill of doing something we weren't supposed to. I didn't want you to stop.

But you did.

This is not perfect, but its not too bad. ha.
Something I might put in what I'm writing at the moment called, 'the barn.'

It's 2010. now live it happy.

You can,

I hate you.
You can be an arse.
You can be a rude shit.
You can be a moody dick.
You can be a smartarse.
You can act like a dick around some people.
You can treat me like shit whenever you're upset.
But,
You can be a sweetheart.
You can be perfect.
You can be lovable.
You can be amazing.
You can listen to me.
You can make me feel the best inside.
I love you.


It's 2010. now live it happy.

Ebay.

FUCK, I love you!
If you were real, I would want to marry you.
You have everything!
whatever I want, I type it in, you have it.
And if you don't, I just have to hit 'international sellers'.
So glad I have you.


It's 2010. now live it happy.

You're not good enough

When you are around someone for so long. And you are your true self around them, You get used to being the real you. And when you join people who have no idea what the real you is like, and you act as real as you can, It's like you're not good enough. Everything You do, or say isn't right. If your opinion is different, They don't care. You feel left out a little. But it's life you guess. No harm done. You only feel like an outsider at the start, then you play pretend again.

It's 2010. now live it happy.

I miss you.

When you want them most,
You can't have them.
When you want them most,
They are busy.
When you want them most,
They don't want you.
When you want them most,
They're just not their.

When you want them most,
You can't get too them.

It's 2010. now live it happy.

2010

First new post, i would like to say, About two nights ago, I had a discussion with someone about what we're going to do with our lives. And we decided, we would finish school we would stay beach bums, and live in a combi. Sleep in a combi, eat in a combi, shower at beach showers with our own soap. Live off the money from centre link.
:)

haha.

Oh how I love that person.

It's 2010. now live it happy.